Sometimes I can't believe that I will still be pregnant at Christmas! Clark was born on December 12, and so we got to have him with us at Christmas. This year I will be about six weeks from delivery at Christmas, give or take. I could play Santa Claus with my belly full of jelly. Ho ho ho!
There is another effect of Christmas coming and not having Boston with us and that is the thought of the unknown. Thoughts like...what if Boston never gets to celebrate Christmas? It is not a new thought. I had the same thoughts on my birthday...that this could be the only time I get to celebrate with Boston. Because of that, we are trying to incorporate him as much as possible into the holidays.
The other effect of Christmas coming is the comparison of our baby to baby Jesus. There is a song on the album City on a Hill: It's Christmas Time and when I listened to it yesterday I broke down in tears. I was listening to the cd in the car and not paying much attention till this song came on. The song is "Child of Love" by Sara Groves. Here are the lyrics:
Child of wonder, close Your eyes
Rest here in my arms tonight
Someday You will save the world
But tonight I'll hold You, right here in my arms
Chorus:
Precious miracle of life, child of love
Gift of hope, the gift of light
From the Father above
And You were made for all mankind
But You will always be mine, child of love
Gabriel's promise has come true
God has blessed this world with You
And as I humbly hold You now
In my heart I know I'm holding heaven's child
You can listen to the song here: http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B00138DJPQ/ref=dm_mu_dp_trk6
It is such a powerful song of Mary's love for her baby Jesus and the bond she felt for him, the need to protect him and comfort him, even while knowing that he was destined for so many great and terrible things. It reminds me of the wonderful joy that is coming when I get to hold Boston in my arms and he is real, tangible, and mine. Knowing that heaven has destined for us to have some time together is such a blessing, whether it be weeks, months, years, or a lifetime.
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